We’re back with the second episode of this 4-part series which I’m calling, “Get Things Done The Easy Way”. The series aims to help you embrace more ease, joy and freedom in life. I delve into a new approach to productivity, one that challenges traditional notions of discipline and motivation, emphasizing instead the ease and joy of doing what we truly want to do.
(Keep reading for a written version of this podcast episode, and stay tuned for the next parts of this series where we delve deeper into making ease a permanent part of your productivity system!)
🔑 In this episode, entitled "Get things done the easy way - part two," we’re unpacking some powerful concepts that can truly shift how you approach your everyday tasks and getting things done. Here’s what you can expect to learn:
1. Choice is Everything: Discover how recognizing the power of choice can transform your daily experiences and long-term goals.
2. Drop the “Musts”and “Shoulds”: Learn how to move beyond these limiting words that can drain the joy and excitement from your activities.
3. Align Actions with Desires: Find out how aligning what you do with what you actually want can boost your motivation and satisfaction.
4. Create Rather than React: Shift from reacting against what you don't want to actively creating what you do want.
⚠ In the episode I’m sharing a motivation exercise, for the full instructions of the exercise you can find them further down in this post along with the full transcript of the episode.
🎧 Please give the episode a listen! And if you’re feeling inspired, head on over to the show notes at insidethecomfortzone.com and try the motivation exercise I outlined. Plus, I would absolutely love to hear from you. Share your thoughts, insights, or even your results from the exercise in the comment section or through a private DM.
Remember, it’s absolutely possible to creating more joy and fulfillment in life and in the work we do through the choices we make every single day .
🙏 Your Participation Counts
I would absolutely love to hear from you. Share your thoughts, insights, or even your results from the exercise in the comment section or through a private DM. Maybe the episode sparked a new idea, or you have a story to share about how shifting your focus has transformed your productivity. I encourage you to hit reply and let me know your thoughts. Your input could shape our future episodes!
How to handle the things you SHOULD or HAVE to do?
Once you start seeing how it’s not really true that if you chose to only do what you wanted to do, you’d end up doing NOTHING, it becomes the gateway to start dealing with all your other commitments and responsibilities that seem to prevent you from doing more of what you want to do.
This is typically when I hear one of the most common questions, or objections: How do I handle the things that I HAVE to do?
Surely there are things that we simply HAVE to do, or at the very least SHOULD do, right?
Well, for me in the past 15 years, the answer to that question has always been: NO.
You don’t HAVE TO DO anything. Accept, I guess the only thing you’re unable to avoid is dying (leaving your physical body behind, at least) … But beyond that I don’t know of many other things you have to do.
I know that this is a challenging concept to adopt. Part because you don’t have any other operational model of getting things done available to you yet, and part because you’ve been taught that life is all about “musts” and “shoulds” by countless people in your life. We’ve been taught that doing what WE want comes second to other people’s wants. Parents, teachers, employers, politicians, society, the entertainment industry and social media, all tell us what we SHOULD do rather than encouraging us to do what it is that WE WANT to do. It’s so ingrained in us that we don’t believe there is another way.
But getting things done by doing what it is that we want, is such a simple thing really, yet we’ve managed to make it very complicated. And not only that, we’ve managed to make it shameful and guilt ridden.
Ultimately we can’t be made to do anything that we don’t want to do. If you’ve ever seen one of the adorable YouTube videos of how big dogs have realised that if there’s something they don’t want to do, they can simply lay down and there’s not a whole lot their pet parent can do about it, then you know that it is very hard to make someone do something they refuse to do. This is why nonviolent civic resistance and coalitions have shown to be 200% more effective than military activities for peace and resolve.
Typically, when we find ourselves taking action despite not wanting to it's often as a REACTION to certain consequences. And making life decisions based on avoiding consequences is hardly the path to living a life of meaning, freedom and fulfilment – at least in my experience. And yet, it’s how the majority of us live.
It’s a very common situation that our motivations and actions originate from our fear of consequences: focused on what we don’t want rather than on what we do want. Even when we make progress in avoiding what we don’t want there’s no progress made towards what we actually want. And it’s no surprise that we at some point stop and ask ourselves, “is this all there is? Is this what I wanted?”.
An important step in doing more of what we want to do is to move beyond the “Musts” and “Shoulds” that typically drive our decisions in life, draining us of energy, joy and meaning. In fact, as I often talk about in my “Inside the comfort zone” concept you can indeed change, perform and get things done all from within your comfort zone, and when you do you can create more lasting, efficient and even fun outcomes – I mean, if it’s not fun, then what’s the point?!
Why would you be doing things that you didn’t like or thought was fun? “Because I have to” is the most common response. Which isn’t necessarily true (I will soon help you see this for yourself), but perhaps even more importantly, do you even want to live a life where the majority (or more) of what you’re doing ISN’T fun?
For example:
Going to work. Do you not want to enjoy what you do? Especially since you’re spending so much time doing it.
Restructuring a certain aspect of your company. Why would you not make it fun or enjoyable, both the implementation and the solution?!
Making a change for your health. Even if it’s something you have to do or risk succumbing to a lifestyle disease, wouldn’t you want it to be fun and/or enjoyable? I mean, it’s about the rest of your life we’re talking about here.
Taking care of your children. Even though raising children can be a challenge, wouldn't you want it to (also) be fun and be able to enjoy the moments together that you can never have back?
Why wouldn’t we make what we do more fun and enjoyable? Because of all the “Musts” and “Shoulds”, right? Let me help you move beyond these (self imposed) obstacles for enjoying life more and doing more of what you want to do.
As I mentioned before, our conditioned reasons for doing things are almost always to avoid certain consequences. At one point when I was still teaching at the personal fitness trainer school that I co-founded, I was demonstrating this principle. In class that time, there was a woman that I’ll call “Kim”, who when she told me that, “you HAVE to take care of your children.” I asked, “What happens if you don’t take care of your children?”
Kim: “They would starve and die.”
Me: “Oh, so what I hear you say is that you DON’T WANT your children to starve and die. So you’re CHOOSING to take care of them, right?”
Kim: “...eh … Yes.”
You never HAVE to do anything. But when you think you do, and it really feels like it, it makes whatever you’re about to do feel energy draining and demotivating. Living a life full of MUSTS and SHOULDS makes life feel less fun. It’s not that you ever HAVE to do something, it’s always a choice – it all comes down to choice. Even if it doesn't feel like it, there’s always a choice. And when you realise this, it opens up options for you, where before there were none. If you don’t like the choices you’re currently making you can simply make a different choice. And when you do, you might experience a greater motivation for what you’re about to do.
Instead of it simply being a REACTION to what you don’t want, when you recognise that it’s actually all a choice, you get to disengage the autopilot and start CREATING the life that you want.
I mentioned before how with big dogs once they realise that they can simply lay down when they want to refuse to do something, once you realise that you can’t be made into doing anything because it’s always a choice, even when it doesn’t feel like it, you can feel more in control and increase your sense of self-confidence. This tends to lower the negative impact of stress and help you feel more motivated to get into action.
Your Level Of Motivation
I’m inviting you to play with your own motivation here and understand how you can put motivation “on speed dial”.
List all your “musts” and “shoulds”
Pick two that matters the most or feels the most heavy.
Place them together with each sentence below:
I have to ____________ .
I should _____________ .
I will _______________ .
I want to ____________ .
I choose to __________ .
I get to _____________ .
Looking at each sentence, grade your level of motivation for each statement, with 1 being the least and 10 the highest. For example, “I have to __ go to school __.” → 3/10 . “I get to __ go to school __.” → 7/10
Looking at the grades you gave each phrase, what’s the phrase that motivates/demotivates you the most?
What’s the word that motivates you the most?
What’s the word that demotivates you the most?
What did you learn from this exercise? Feel free to share your insights in the comments section or send me a private DM here on Substack – I’d love to know more about you and your experience.
The Power Of Choice
If you’re beginning to see how there are really no “Musts” or Shoulds” but rather CHOICE – only always, and you’re seeing how thinking otherwise has a significant impact on your level of motivation, I want you to start exercising the power of choice – of choosing what it is that you want to CREATE.
Instead of taking action from a place of REACTING to what you don’t want I want you to access the possibility of taking action from a place of CREATING what it is that you do want. Similar to what I was saying in the previous article of this series, how what we tend to think we want is often a reaction to what we currently have, only the opposite, which isn’t very creative, what I’m inviting you to explore is to work from endless possibility and to go after what it is that you truly want so that you can live life on your own terms.
When you fail to recognize the choice, which is always available, you’re coming from a place of restriction and limitation. Your options are already pre-defined and the outcomes limited. When you instead recognise that it all comes down to choice you’re able to (perhaps for the very first time) choose what you want to do.
If I were to try to guide you in making a choice from a place of CREATING here’s what I would say:
Rather than getting stuck on how things WERE or are RIGHT NOW, think or even better, FEEL into what option or choice feels expansive as opposed to contracting; where there’s a “pull towards” instead of a “push against”; or where there’s a lightness compared to a heaviness. If you can feel that, then you’re onto something that is more aligned with what it is that you truly want, instead of simply trying to avoid what you DON’T want.
When you’re making decisions and taking action from the place of choice, life starts to feel much easier, and getting things done will become easier too.
In Conclusion
There are no MUSTS or SHOULDS. it’s not that you HAVE to do anything, it’s that you GET to do it, if you CHOOSE to do it, only always. Seeing this will help you uplevel your level of motivation almost immediately. And when what you choose to do is coming from a place of CREATION instead of a REACTION to what you don’t want, you’re starting to build a life of meaning, freedom and fulfilment.
It’s all a choice. And if you don’t like how things are, you can make a different choice.
Please send me a DM sharing your insights or leave a comment helping others receive their own “permission slip” to do more of what they want.
Music from #Uppbeat
https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/thermal
https://uppbeat.io/t/skyle/dusty
https://uppbeat.io/t/fortune-cookie/meadows-groovetide
https://uppbeat.io/t/avbe/45-rpm
https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble
Get Things Done The Easy Way - Part Two